Today Raul and I had a good convo with friends regarding relationships, namely: be protective or be possessive? [Disclaimer: I am not an expert on this. I am solely sharing my thoughts from experience] In our relationship, Raul has been protective, but I have had the propensity to be possessive. Is there a difference? Yes. Let me explain. Raul has always protected me–he is good about not airing out our dirty laundry to people; he ensures that our home is safe with an alarm system & with getting up when things go bump in the night; and he trusts God with me even though he may not trust others around me. I, on the other hand, have had the tendency to be possessive–I have made assumptions based on my lack of trust; and early on, I tried to keep Raul on a short leash & tried to keep us together, at the cost of NOT letting God do that.  When we take control of the relationship instead of God, we move from “protection” to “possession.” When we neurotically assume worse-case-scenarios and incessantly interrogate or suspect…we are being possessive. But people are not possessions–they are gifts. You protect a gift and most importantly, you understand that the gift is not yours. The ones we are dating or married to are God’s. He’s given them to us as His special treasure. Possess them? No. Protect them? Always. What do you all think?

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